Why had you been on the program in the first place?

I said before: I had never heard of either the program or the man. I did not contact the show first; it was the other way around. The staff insisted that they were booked way ahead and that I must make my first appearance immediately, before having had a chance to learn more about it. I begged them repeatedly but they denied my request.

Couldn't you have watched an episode at home first?

I WAS FIRST CONTACTED BY THE PROGRAM ON A MONDAY. THEY MADE ME MAKE MY FIRST APPEARANCE THE FRIDAY OF THAT SAME WEEK. BECAUSE THE SHOW AIRED ON SATURDAY NIGHTS, I COULDN'T POSSIBLY HAVE VIEWED THE SHOW IN THE NORMAL WAY UNTIL THE DAY AFTER MY TAPING.

If the show, its norms and contents, proved so offensive, why didn't you just leave?

I was made to sign releases before any taping was done; I was afraid the staff would take action against me. But also, I was a long way from home. I didn't know anyone. I didn't know my way around the premises and since I had no car and had been brought in by limo, I could not return home by myself.

Furthermore, in the "Howie-wood Squares" instance. I was strategically positioned in the tic-tac-toe grid so that I was trapped. I was in the top row, and had to enter via a rollaway staircase which was immediately removed. Being at least two stories up, I couldn't have left without jumping from the grid and risking injury.

Why didn't you talk things over?

I TRIED VERY HARD TO LEARN ABOUT THE SHOW BEFORE DOING ANYTHING, BUT THE STAFF WAS UNCOOPERATIVE OR EVASIVE. IN ARRANGING FOR THE FIRST TIME, I WAS UNABLE TO TALK DIRECTLY TO MR. STERN. THOUGH IT WAS HIS SHOW, HE WAS NEVER REACHABLE.

AFTERWARD, EITHER UPON COMPLETION OF A TAPING OR BACK AT HOME, ONLY THE STAFF, NOT MR. STERN, WERE AVAILABLE FOR TALKING -- ESPECIALLY WHEN I HAD TO COMPLAIN OF ILL TREATMENT.

Especially within the studio itself, I was unable to discuss matters with him because:

(1) he would slip away,
(2) it may have been another guest's turn,
(3) the directors would make me go somewhere else.

I could speak directly to him only when on the air; he always took advantage of me.

Why were you on the show more than once?

Through deceit and guile!

The first time, I was told that the only free space available was the end of that same week. Very soon after, they were planning that "Hollywood Squares" travesty. Although I didn't realize that until after. Again, they said that the installment was to be made at the end of that week -- only a couple of days hence!

Because the first time had proved a nightmare, I was suspicious. But they said that big-time, straightforward celebrities would make up the panel; and being "extra-special," I was desired greatly. They mentioned, by name, Gene Rayburn and Jaye P. Morgan among the prospects. I took their word in good faith that the installment would be a clean, decent one like the conventional game.

Alas, I was dead wrong. When the limo brought me to the studio, the rest of the cast was already assembled since I had been delayed in traffic. When I came into the room, except for the two aforementioned stars, all the other panelists, waiting, proved to exemplify a rouges' gallery of human vices! Punk-rock artists, fortune tellers, and --worst!-- a Ku Klux Klansman and a pair of seductresses! And the game questions posed were in line with their vices -- extramarital love affairs, drugs, fornication, etc. I couldn't believe my ears; I wanted to bail out but was trapped in the grid.

And that episode was not the end of it. For about a month I heard nothing more from them, but then in the latter half of April, I was informed that, in the manner of the Oscars, there was to be an awards episode to guests who had been outstanding in various themes. Apparently I had been nominated for Best Choreography, and must be present there to receive the award and make a speech, as did other series-award winners.